Bush's hair says it all

Oh come on. Watching Dubya's last conference, you had to feel a tinge of sympathy for the guy. Not only is he clearly not living on the same planet as us, well, look at him. His skin is wrinkly and ashen, and then there's his hair. Whoa. Of course Presidents go grey in the course of an administration -- that's to be expected -- but his scalp looks as brittle and dry as Texas earth in August. His hair honestly looks like you could pull it out with a slight tug. What he needs, in addition to the kind of personality overhaul only Dr. Phil, Deepak Chopra and Oprah combined could perform, is a series of deep conditioning sessions -- perhaps including eggs, olive oil and mayonnaise. At the very least, he needs a few treatments with hot oil. Isn't that ironic?